i tried to e-mail jim (swirling brain) but his address and webpage don't work anymore.
here's the message i sent:
as a jew living in nyc (well, just outside right now, actually), i'm disappointed to hear of your treatment on your recent visit. most likely, you were treated badly because they thought you were a non-orthodox jew. some of the local orthodox communities think badly of those of us who are not orthodox and are, well, less than welcoming to us. i think that had they known you were a gentile you would have received better treatment. that's usually the case, anyway: you're friend who indicated the orthodox welcome for outsiders is correct.
alas, it's a shame either way.